yesterday was unusually quiet. the little man woke up sick, and spent almost all day on the sofa and in bed, sleeping most of the time. he doesn't nap anymore, so that left me with wonderful pockets of time when i found both children sleeping and myself in an almost forgotten state of freedom.
so i cancelled our playdate and spent the day in quiet. i knit a tiny bit. i read a bit. but most of all (in between nursing, rocking and playing with the baby), i stroked his face, made tea, lit candles, made sure he is covered, and stroked his face some more.
it really brought me back to that most basic mama feeling. the feeling that sometimes gets lost in between the laundry mountains, the dirty diapers, the mess, the endless preparation of snacks... to just be there. being there for them and with them. and everything else drifts into insignificance.